3 Things You Should Tell Your Husband Often

Your husband is probably not much of a talker. Most men aren't. It's the one common complaint women have about them. They don't talk about how they feel. Sometimes, women take that to mean they have a different emotional depth than women do. The truth of the matter is that men do feel things. In some ways, men feel even more deeply than women who wear their emotions on their sleeves quite often.



Because they don't talk about their feelings, though, women often feel like it's a waste of breath to discuss how they feel about their husbands with their husbands. Unfortunately, their husbands need to hear these words of affirmation. These are three of the things your husband NEEDS to hear from you as often as possible.

1) How Much You Respect Him - Respect is important to your husband. He may never demand it. He'll almost certainly never ask for it. But, it means a lot to him. Of all the people in the world, he wants your respect the most -- and that's something he may never even admit to himself. Let him know that you respect him and make sure you tell him WHY you respect him while you're at it.

3 Things You Should Tell Your Husband Often

2) That You Still Find Him Attractive - No matter how many years you've been together he still needs hear that you still believe he's the most handsome man on the planet.  He needs to know that you only have eyes for him. Most importantly of all, he needs to feel like you mean it when you say these things.

3) How Much You Love the Way He Makes You Feel - Think about all the little things your husband does for you - to protect you, to make you happy, and to keep you safe. He's trying to take care of you. He's showing you how he feels by doing those things and this should make you FEEL cherished, loved, and even adored by him. Let him know that he does make you feel all these things and more.

Bonus - Actions speak louder than words any day of the week. Telling him how you feel is great. It will mean a lot to him. However, if you combine the telling of these things with actions that reinforce the message you're trying to convey it will be much clearer for him. Acts can be touching him, rubbing his shoulders, scratching his back, making his favorite meal, or going out of your way to make the house look extra nice and tidy. Whatever it is that pleases him most - after all, you know him best.

You don't have to buy expensive gifts to make your guy feel loved and appreciated by you. Simple gestures sometimes get the greatest mileage. But, when you tell your husband these things often, you'll have a happier, healthier marriage in a home that's filled with love and affection.

3 Signs he may be ready to leave you soon.

It is a sad but true fact of life that not all great things last forever. This saying is especially true when it comes to relationships.

Human interaction is transactional, meaning that it changes over time. When people are around each other more often, they get to know more about each other and the feelings they have may eventually change.
Relationships can feel like a roller coaster at times, constantly experiencing ups and downs. But at times it can be hard to tell if a down is ever going to make its way back up.

It is undoubtedly difficult to differentiate between momentary turbulence in a relationship and a true end. Men can be incredibly hard to read at times, leaving women paranoid that they are planning to leave them.

There are a few things men commonly do before ending a relationship that women can keep their eyes peeled for.

1. An Increase in Irritability and Arguing

It isn't the end of the world when you have an argument with your companion. As a matter of fact, being open about conflicts of interests is a perfectly healthy part of a functional relationship.

But if your partner is stepping beyond the line of moderation when it comes to arguing, it may be a sign that he is trying to pry his way out of a relationship.

Does he seem more irritable and easily annoyed at small things? Does he start pointless arguments that seem to just pop up out of nowhere? Sometimes when men are looking to end a relationship they want to confirm that it is going nowhere.

3 Signs he may be ready to leave you soon.

They may feel that if the relationship has frequent arguing it will be easier to walk away from. Because of this, it is common for people to subconsciously start arguments and create tension.

2. More Distance Between the Two of You

Every relationship requires time away from each other. It is unhealthy to constantly be around one another, which will most often lead to people getting sick of their partner. If you realize that your partner is becoming increasingly distant however, it may be a red flag for your relationship. If he is interacting less with you and seems to avoid contact it could mean that he is preparing for a breakup.

This is even worse than an increase in arguing because it is much harder to notice. A lot of people who have thoughts of breaking up will try to withdraw themselves emotionally from their partner in an effort to make it easier for them.

They think they can soften the blow of a breakup by slowly prying themselves from the bond. One good way to confirm this is to reflect on the intimacy level of your relationship, which most often is the first area that suffers.

3. Different Behavior Around Other Women

When men think about leaving relationships, they usually look ahead and try to prepare themselves. If they have been in a relationship for quite some time their flirting skills may have significantly decreased. This is by no means an excuse to be paranoid and jealous of every woman, but you should stay mindful of the way he interacts with them.

If he is much friendlier and forming new bonds with females, he could be preparing himself for the single life. If he is treating other women with more attention and optimism than he is to you, try talking to him about it before making any accusations.

It is important to be careful when doing this since paranoia can easily cloud one's judgement.

When a breakup comes from out of the blue it can be absolutely devastating. Both men and women are complicated to read at the end of a relationship. If you are skeptical of their interests, the best thing you can do is sit down and talk to them about it.

There is no point in continuing a relationship when one person wants out. On the flip side, you could find out that it is just a rough spot and you were over-thinking it. Just remember that communication is key when it comes to saving relationships.

Great Date Night Movies for Romance

While movies are not always the perfect date night choice, sometimes, when life is hectic, the DVD player and take-out from your favorite restaurant hits the spot quite nicely. Of course, you have to have the right date night movies to set the proper tone. Rather than going out and getting the latest Redbox blockbuster, consider these old standards instead.

Dangerous Liaisons

What movie offers more for a date night movie fest. Seduction. Intrigue. Scandal. It's all in there and more. The acting is superb. The film is engrossing. The time period is far removed from the every day. It's a great escape film the two of you can enjoy together - time and time again if necessary.

Aliens

You'll have a hard time finding a better date night movie than one that will have her literally jumping into your lap. This film has all that and more. Adrenaline is a standard while watching the film that is well acted and features characters that are engrossing to say the least. After the film is over you can have a lot of fun staying up all night together because, really, who can sleep after watching that?

The Tourist

Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie. Need anyone say more? This movie is filled with twists, turns, and misdirection. Once you know how the story ends, it's worth going back and watching again to look for hints and clues. Great date night fun for a film that's hard to grow tired of.

Great Date Night Movies for Romance

The Blindside

This one is a "bring the box of Kleenex" film. While the story itself isn't sad, it is, at the very least poignant. This makes it a sure hit with ladies for date night and the combination of Sandra Bullock and football make it a great choice for the guys as well. The fact that it's based on a true story makes it all the more touching and a great night to have her feeling emotional and romantic.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Another great Angelina Jolie flick, this one also stars Brad Pitt. The movie itself is action packed and full of not-so-passive aggression. If only all couples could work out their marital difficulties so easily. It certainly will help you both appreciate the normalcy of your lives together.

Date night will never be a complete and total dud if you load up your DVD with any one of these great date night movie. Just remember that the purpose of date night is to spend time together so choose movies you're both likely to have at least some interest in watching.

Having Trouble Getting Your Ex Back? Try This Instead

Wise people say that the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again while expecting different results. So many people, in the aftermath of an unexpected and/or unwanted breakup, find themselves falling into patterns of insanity while trying to get their exes back.

It's quite common.

Your heart is screaming so loud that it drowns out the things your brain is trying to tell you. The one thing your heart knows for sure is that it wants to stop HURTING.



It knows that the breakup is the source of the pain and it wants to fix it. NOW! The thing is, your heart says crazy things, such as: apologize, beg, and bargain. These are the things that will do far more to harm your cause than to see it through.

Instead of repeating all the things that aren't working, let's try a different tactic this time around. Let's go for different results. Here's what you need to do instead.

Agree with Your Ex

Want to stop an argument dead in its tracks? Agree with the arguer. First of all, it's a shocking experience. There have probably been many times in the course of your relationship together that you've continued an argument you'd known you were losing just because you weren't ready to admit defeat. We've all done it.

Stopping the argument is one thing. It's a grudging acceptance, but one your ex can mentally process. However, AGREEING with your ex is a new tactic that will leave your ex reeling.

Having Trouble Getting Your Ex Back? Try This Instead

More importantly, it will leave your ex thinking of you in an intrigued and perplexed way. Your ex thinks he or she already knows what's coming next. Agreeing throws them off balance and reveals that you do, in fact, still have a few tricks up your sleeve.

Stop Trying so Hard

I'm not advocating giving up. I'm not even telling you that you shouldn't try to get your ex back. I'm telling you stop working so HARD. You need to work SMARTER; not harder. The direct approach isn't going to work in the days and short weeks following your breakup. You're going to need to do your best work behind the scenes if you really want to get your ex's attention.

Begin with what you know about your ex. How did you win his or her heart in the first place? What is it about you that your ex has claimed to love the most? Identify that. Understand it and save it for later.

Next you need to identify where the problems started. Was there a specific event, argument, or misunderstanding that began a downward spiral for your relationship? What could you do now that would tip the scales once again in your favor? Now is the time for thinking and not the time for action.

Do you need help coming up with the exact plan of action or working out the timing of putting your plan into motion? More importantly, do you have a plan for what comes next? Once you get your ex back, you need to know what it's going to take to keep your relationship on a more even path in the future. Let me help you with that and so much more.

Many Layers of Couple Communication

Sometimes the hardest things facing couples stems from what should be the simplest things for them. Thriving relationships have one thing in common, good communication. Hurdles to talking with one another come in several forms. Some partners point to their childhood where they were not given the tools to communicate effectively. Others develop patterns where they deflect certain levels of conversation as a way to protect themselves. Being able to connect conversationally on several depths provide a variety of topics and reveal more about one another.



Light Level

In this area, couples talk about all the fun stuff. They joke with each other. They share things like their favorite movies, the songs they dance around to when no one is watching and the best Thai food they have ever eaten. All of these things sound like the frivolous flotsam and jetsam easily ignored. Does it really matter that someone danced to the twist at their fourth birthday? We all need fun. We all need safe topics. Without them, going any further becomes almost impossible because who wants to share the pain of their parent's divorce if they can't confess how formative the Mad Max series of movies are.

It is also easy at the beginning of a relationship, but these fun items keep a relationship exciting. Going out for a private dinner where guessing their new favorite song pulses vitality into the relationship of an established couple. By putting aside serious topics for a short time, people can reengage with the partner they met.

Little Deeper

This moderate level of communication allows partners to open up about their thoughts on more serious issues, their personal history and feelings they might have. Saying they like a movie or song is one thing, but explaining the reason for the love gives a clearer picture of them as a person. Also, hearing a partner plays a certain song when they feel isolated provides a clue for when the music is blaring on a random night.

Many Layers of Couple Communication 

These item usually have to be said a couple of times. They may even need to be rephrased because people generally, even when told directly, fail correlate these items. Being aware of this challenge permits couples to extend a bit of patience to one another. The longer they are together the clearer the patterns may become. They can also gently remind the other of something they have said previously because of their history.

Way Deep

This level of communication, typically, is the most challenging. The areas of discussion reveal the most hidden things about a partner including their fears, embarrassments and ways they have been hurt the deepest. Deep truths exposed too early either demonstrate a lack of understanding of their gravity or poor communication training. These things are parsed out over time and are sometimes seen best from the outside.

While this level can be quite messy, it is also where deep love resides. Couples with long history where they have heard all the silly stories and revel in knowing why those stories matter are able to profess deep love for one another. This love, this bedrock, will stand when nothing else will. A couple talking on this level will be able to face the challenge of the future as a forged unit.

While all these areas exist, using them all is critical. Staying in one exclusively damages the relationship because either no deeper knowledge of one another flourishes or seriousness chokes out all the fun. Find safe times to have a variety of conversations because they reveal all the beautiful facets of every relationship.

Moving On from a Broken Heart

One of the biggest challenges in life is to let a relationship go. No matter what happened, learning to accept it's over is often difficult. Your partner may have been a spouse, your first love, or the one that got away.

In spite of the fact the relationship is over, some people find it very difficult to get past the hurt and break the connection they once had with their previous partner. Moving on may be the hardest thing they will ever have to do.

Recovering from the immense pain and sadness of a broken heart is no picnic. When two people fall in love, they want it to last forever and honestly believe it will.

But when the relationship doesn't last, the pain can be overwhelming and the future seem hopeless. What's more, if the person who can't let go continues to relive the devastating pain of the breakup, may end up in a vicious cycle of despair and misery.

Emotional Devastation

Just because a relationship has ended, doesn't mean the feelings are going to disappear overnight. The aftermath of a breakup can leave you feeling rejected, angry, grief-stricken, lonely, and empty.
In fact, you may call your ex repeatedly or contact your ex's friends in an attempt to maintain some sort of connection to them. This is a natural human reaction to a lost love. And while it's understandable, it will prevent you from healing and moving on with your life.

In order to get your life back on track, you must close the door to your past - or you will never have a future. You cannot live in the past if you want to ever be happy again.

What happened is over. No amount of wishing or wanting is going to change or undo what's been done. The sooner you can accept this, the sooner you will find peace.

For Your Sake Put the Past Behind You

In order to experience a sense of closure, you must let go of the desperate feeling that you can't survive without your ex partner. Negative feelings such as guilt, failure, resentment, and anger must be addressed and effectively managed.

While it's normal to feel this way under the circumstances, it should only be temporary. Continuing to hold on to these bad feelings not only keeps you from healing, it also destroys any chance of you ever being happy again and living a rich full life.

Why Self Worth is so Important After a Breakup

Many times when a relationship comes to an end, one or both people adopt an attitude of failure and low self-esteem. They base their self worth on the success or failure of the relationship.

Moving On from a Broken Heart

This is extremely damaging in terms of your emotional state of mind. Never should a person determine their own self worth by measuring themselves against another person.

By learning to love yourself unconditionally, you will be able to survive a devastating breakup or anything else life throws at you.

Starting the Healing Process by Moving On

While there's no way to magically and instantly stop the hurt and pain of a lost love, there are indeed several ways to heal yourself. Focus on changing the things you can, and let go of what you cannot.

- Stop all communication with your ex (unless you have kids). Refrain from calling, texting, and following them. Harassing them and trying to maintain contact keeps you bound to the pain.

- It's over, done, finished - it's history. Stop beating yourself up over whose fault it was, what you could have done better, and generally blaming yourself.

Forgive the other person and yourself to find happiness again. The better you feel about yourself, the easier it will be to move on.

- Get out there and start mingling with other people. Remember when you used to have fun? And when you do start dating again, never talk about your ex and the details of your relationship and/or breakup.

You're out on a date. This could be the start of a wonderful new relationship. Why are you dredging up the past? Leave your cares behind - this is a new day.

Healing Takes Time

Give yourself enough time to heal your broken heart. Being happy with who you are will allow you to feel joy with someone new.

Moving on can be painful, but the good news is you will discover who you are in the process and eventually find someone even better. Hang on. You're worth it.

Recovery Myths

At the end of a relationship, it seems as though everyone has some helpful (and sometimes not so helpful) advice. These tidbits of “wisdom” range from the annoying “You’re better off now” to the offensive “I don’t know what you saw in him anyway”.
Unfortunately, these little snippets of help often lead to myths that make you feel as though something is wrong with you.
Let’s dispel some of the more common breakup myths and get you back onto the road to recovery.

“Your ex was a jerk – don’t waste time missing him.” This classic line sounds like good advice on the surface. The reality is that a breakup is an emotional event. While your ex may in fact, be a jerk, you saw something in him that drew you to him, so there was some connection between you.

When you lose that connection, there is a loss that can cause you emotional pain. You will still need to move through the stages of loss before you can move on in your life. Even when your ex is a jerk, you are actually mourning the loss of the good parts of the relationship – so it makes sense that you will be sad.

“Missing him is a sign that you should still be together.” This is bad thinking. Much like a drug addict misses their drug of choice – even years after the last time they took it – missing something is not a sure-fire sign that you were meant to be together.

This is an emotional response to the loss, and should not be taken as reasons to get back together. When you lose something, you miss it – even if it was not good for you or if you are glad the relationship is over – there is still a sense of loss that must be worked through.

Recovery Myths

“Just get over it.” If sadness could be swept away with a flip of a switch the world would be a different place. Your friends and family likely don’t want you to be sad, so they want you to be able to move on as quickly as possible.

Just willing yourself to get over the loss is not an effective (or healthy) way of dealing with the end of a relationship. Don’t fight the stages of relationship loss – they are all important. You will “get over it” when you are ready to move on.

“You should be over it by now.” We’ve all been there – the long days of sadness and anger feel like they will never end. Unfortunately, there isn’t a time limit or a specific number of days that the grief will last.

Moving on from an ended relationship is different for every person, so there is no way to determine how long the process will take – you can only move through the grieving process until you find yourself through it.

Each person is different, and ending a relationship is different for each person. Don’t get caught up in the ideas that other people tell you. Mourn the loss of your relationship, and move through each stage so that you can be ready to face a new relationship when it presents itself.

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